If your life at home is starting to look like an episode of “Neighborhood Wars,” the A&E TV series that captures real neighbor battles over everything from barking dogs to backyard lights and package deliveries to parking spaces, you may be thinking about moving. But before you do, you need to realize that wherever you go–unless it’s an isolated rural ranch–you’ll have neighbors to contend with.
There are, of course, plenty of people who love their neighbors and socialize with them. Many help each other in times of need. Borrowing a cup of sugar or watering each other’s plants actually happens in some communities. But sadly, research shows that fewer Americans know and trust their neighbors than in the past.
In a March 2025 survey, Pew Research Center found that just one-fourth (26%) of Americans know most or all of their neighbors, while 62% know only some neighbors, and 12% don’t know any of their neighbors. That’s down from 31% of people who said they knew all or most of their neighbors in 2018.
Trust levels are down, too. In 2015, Pew Research found that 52% of Americans said they trust all or most of their neighbors. In their 2025 survey, just 44% said they trust all or most their neighbors, while 46% said they trust some of the people in their neighborhood and 9% don’t trust any of their neighbors.
Are Politics Driving Neighbor Disputes?
In 2022, a LendingTree survey found that 73% of Americans dislike at least one of their neighbors, and 23% have called the police about their neighbors. The groups most likely to dislike a neighbor (79% in each group) are Gen Zers, apartment dwellers, and Northeasterners.
While political rancor is a factor in some neighbor disputes, the three main reasons people told LendingTree that they dislike their neighbors are simpler: they give off a “weird vibe,” are too loud, and are rude.
Being similar to your neighbors correlates with how much you trust them, according to Pew Research. Half of Americans say all or most of their neighbors are the same race or ethnicity as they are, and 38% say their neighbors have the same level of education. But when it comes to politics, less than a quarter (23%) say they have the same political views as all or most of their neighbors.
Nearly 4 in 10 (37%) of Americans want neighbors whose political beliefs match their own, according to LendingTree. This is most important to Gen Zers (46%), and more important to homeowners than renters (42% versus 33%). Across party lines, there’s virtually no variation among Republicans (42%) and Democrats (43%) who prefer to live with likeminded people.
What Neighbors Do for Each Other–or Don’t Do
Despite their differences or lack of trust, most adults (59%) told Pew that they have a neighbor they’d feel comfortable asking to keep a set of keys for emergencies. Survey respondents also said they would do things for their neighbors such as:
On the other hand, expectations are low for their neighbors, with just 52% saying neighbors would bring in their mail or water their plants, and only 42% believing someone would bring them a meal if they were sick.
But maybe some people are listening to Jeff Somers, who wrote a LifeHacker column about how doing things for your neighbors could actually backfire. He says that doing things such as mowing your neighbor’s lawn or raking their leaves, while seemingly friendly, could trigger an argument. Some people want to grow their grass higher or prefer to turn their leaves into mulch or compost them. Even taking in a package could create a rift, especially if you forget to let your neighbor know you have it. A bigger issue could be providing strangers with information about a neighbor’s house or their vacation plans–that could result in a fine from the city government or a robbery.
The bottom line: Communicate with your neighbors and get to know them a bit before you “help” them in a way that they may not appreciate.
The Homeowners Association Solution?
Some people assume that living in a homeowners association (HOA) can eliminate or at least reduce feuds between neighbors, but that’s not always the case. A homeowners association provides a framework for relations between neighbors including rules that govern how everyone handles their pets and their property.
According to the Foundation for Community Association Research, 77.1 million Americans—33.6% of the U.S. population—live in community associations, which include both condo associations and homeowners associations (HOAs).
“Community associations actively foster neighborly connections through social events, shared amenities and volunteer opportunities—creating stronger relationships and a greater sense of belonging,” says Dawn M. Bauman, CAE, chief executive officer at Community Associations Institute. “While occasional disputes occur, most are resolved through direct dialogue or established community processes - demonstrating how these structures preserve harmony while building vibrant neighborhoods people love.”
Still, people are people, and neighbors often annoy each other. Beyond those top three reasons people don’t like their neighbors, other common issues include pets that cause disruption, nosy busybody neighbors, lack of exterior maintenance, noisy or unruly kids, guests who park in their neighbor’s spot, smoking smells, and short-term rentals, according to LendingTree. Not all of those issues can be addressed by an HOA.
“Disputes between neighbors in community associations are rare and can involve routine issues like noise or parking, but our data shows 94% of residents get along with their neighbors, and 86% rate their community experience positively,” Bauman says. “When concerns arise, most are resolved quickly through respectful dialogue or established processes.”
However, an HOA can only go so far depending on the issues between neighbors. Community associations are designed to uphold shared standards, not mediate personal disagreements, Bauman says.
“When conflicts involve rule violations—like noise or property upkeep—boards can facilitate solutions through dialogue or established grievance processes,” she says. “However, purely interpersonal matters are best resolved between neighbors. We strongly encourage neighbors to first attempt resolving issues through respectful, in-person conversation - this approach maintains positive relationships and solves most concerns.”
But the direct approach doesn’t always work–and if you’ve ever watched an episode of “Neighborhood Wars” you know that disputes can get ugly and even dangerous in some instances.
“If direct communication isn't possible or effective, residents should review their community's governing documents, which typically outline a clear process for submitting concerns to the board or management company,” Bauman says. “Community associations are designed to handle violations of shared standards through progressive steps: usually beginning with education and reminders, then potentially moving to mediation, hearings or other formal actions if needed.”
Sometimes neighborhood feuds start because some members of the community are dissatisfied with their management company or HOA. In some cases, one resident will agitate against the board or management company and try to gather neighborhood support with private email groups or mass mailings that can pit neighbor against neighbor.
“When neighbors organize around concerns, it's an opportunity to improve community dialogue,” Bauman says. “We recommend boards guide these conversations toward proper channels such as open meetings, mediation or the association's established grievance process. This ensures all voices are heard while maintaining respectful, productive discussions aligned with community standards.”
In other words, there’s not a simple solution to end neighbor disputes. Can’t we all just get along? Maybe not, but anticipating pain points and trying to put yourself in your neighbor’s point of view may help.